I was so tired of jumping from one thing to another. I’d get going in a direction that felt so perfect for me, and I’d be really excited, thinking I’d finally found my “thing” . . . only to lose interest, again, a few months (sometimes weeks) into it.
I was always starting over. And it was exhausting.
Thankfully, I came across a handful of things that helped me get some stability — to be clear on what does and does not work for me, and that helped me to figure out which way to go.
Here are a few of those things:
1 | JOURNALING
I’ve kept a diary, or journal, since I was around 10 years old. And, while it started as a simple log of what I did each day, it has now morphed into a way for me to sort out my thoughts.
I know a lot of people are intimidated by the idea of journaling. But there’s really no right or wrong way to do it. Just grab a pen and notebook (or, an app — whatever you prefer), and start jotting down what’s going on, how you feel about it, and any ideas you’ve got for how to proceed. Over time, it will become more natural.
The benefits are huge, though. I’ve had so many “aha” moments from reading back through old entries, or just from pouring out my thoughts and being able to make sense of what’s been tangled up inside my head.
2 | CURIOSITY (or, a willingness to learn)
Because I am always exploring new ideas, and reading to learn new perspectives & new ways to do things, I’ve stumbled across some amazingly helpful books and articles.
Two such things I read gave me a huge “aha”! They both said that we don’t have just one thing we’re meant to do with our lives — that our “purpose” will shift and change along with the different seasons of our lives. Maybe in one “season”, mother hood is your purpose. And then, in another, perhaps entrepreneurship becomes your purpose. (And, even within those things, it could get even more nuanced — like biological children & adoption; or “working” as a blogger/affiliate, and coaching).
It was such a relief, though, to know that I wouldn’t have to box myself into one path for the rest of my career! It made all the difference!
3 | COACHING
I’d heard, over and over, that you should invest in yourself by hiring a coach. The experts all say that it’s the way you scale up. But, when you’re broke, that seems impossible.
The good news is, it’s not impossible. I kept searching and praying, as I was desperate for the accountability, and I was eager to learn. And eventually, God led me to find someone I could partner with in a bartering situation — I helped her, and she gave me coaching in exchange.
And, oh goodness! I have come so far since beginning to work with my coach! My progress excelled at lightning-speed, and I got so much clarity! It really does help to have someone you can bounce your ideas off of, who will ask you clarifying questions and who’ll challenge you to go beyond what you think are your limits. I truly thank God for my coach!
(Note: A lot of what I needed in the early years, I now realize, was more of a strategist than a coach, because when you’re just starting out, you don’t know what you don’t know. A coach’s questions, therefore, can sometimes be more frustrating than helpful, whereas, a strategist will offer suggestions and advice. However, there comes a point where you’re ready to shift from strategist to coach, and I found my coach right when I needed her the most).
. . . . . . . . . . . .
Now, thanks to this combination of journaling, curiosity, and coaching, I feel confident in my path forward. I still have certain kinks I’m working out, of course. But overall, I’m much more grounded, and I know what will or will not align with where I intend to go.
Check out my services if you’re interested in fast-tracking your own clarity. I offer single sessions, as well.